Alright, so I'm a day late with this one due to some un-postponeable home repair issues. Trust me, I would have much rather been producing a podcast, and let's leave it at that. Particularly since I REALLY like this week's episode. So, once again, if you haven't listened yet- now would be a good time to start. And, as always: Subscribe, iTunes, blah, blah, blah. 

On This Week's Episode: A pastor makes a tentative call to 911, after getting himself trapped in a pair of handcuffs - A man is nearly smothered to death by his girlfriends giant breasts - while another looses part of his ear to his mate - a Florida man tries to rob a convenience store without a gun - Yoga in California classrooms - A 20 year old woman trapped in the body of a toddler - All the crazy that is, Alex Jones - a bit of David Icke - Ted Nugent thinks he's Rosa Parks, former NRA president Marion Hammer, says banning guns is racist, and the rest of the ongoing gun insanity.

Our Favorite Things For The Week: Tara longs for a snap together circuit set of her very own, while I introduce you all to yet another crazy person from the Internets- The 3rd Eagle of The Apocalypse -AKA- William Tapely.

Also check out: Jon Ronson's 1999 Documentary with Alex Jones: Secret Rulers of The World:Bohemian Grove

This month's show art: Tara

-CAINE-

Though I suspect the majority of you who manage to find your way to this site were already well aware of his existence, last week, much of the world had it's first introduction to Radio host and conspiracy theorist Alex Jones, after he appeared on Peirs Morgans talk show and semi-coherently frothed and ranted about gun control. Not one to pass up an opportunity for a little free press, this appearance was immediately followed with an equally insane visit with the Huffington Post, where Jones expanded his ramblings beyond guns, to include some of his other pet conspiracies about vaccines and GMO, amongst other things. He also opted to trade in all the screaming he did about revolution during his appearance on Morgan's show, with an even more theatrical outburst. Which he screamed, red faced, into his webcam as the interview drew to a close. It was more than a little comical, honestly. -

"THEY'VE GOT POISON IN THE WATER! POISON IN THE WATER! THIS IS A NORMAL RESPONSE TO THIS! THIS IS HOW THEY SHOULD HAVE RESPONDED TO HITLER! YOU'RE IN DANGER! YOU'RE IN DANGER! YOU'RE IN DANGER, EVERYBODY WATCHING! THEY CONTROL BOTH PARTIES! YOU'RE IN DANGER! WAKE UP! GET OUT OF YOUR TRANCE! THEY SHOULD HAVE RESISTED HITLER LIKE THIS!" 

Now, as I said, I suspect most of you already knew exactly who, and what, Alex Jones is. Or if you didn't before, hopefully you do now. And I actually spend a good 15 minutes or so talking about him on this week's episode of the podcast (hint, hint) so I don't want to draw things out too much here as well. But his ever more frequent encounters with David Icke ( Who WILL get an entry of his very own, someday) alone, are enough to warrant adding Alex Jones to the collection of crazies I've been slowly compiling on the site over the years. So just in case, let's start with the basics, via the opening paragraph from Jones' entry on Rational Wiki:


But, less you think a site called Rational Wiki, might be a bit biased in it's description of the man, you need look no further than either of Jones' own  dot coms; Infowars, and Prison planet, to see that the paragraph above barely even begins to scratch the surface. Because woven within the impressive tapestry of crazy he's managed to fabricate for himself, there is also a deep undercurrent of  religious nonsense as well. In fact, most, if not all, of the beliefs and conspiracies Alex pushes ultimately boil down to "Satan-O-Phobia"- which is a stupid word I just made up, cause, it's late, and I'm too lazy to find a better one. Also, I like it. and it's my blog so, deal.

Take, for instance, a meandering conspiracy involving (amongst other things) the short lived Lone Gunmen series, and which stretches all the way back to 1993, before culminating in what the Info Wars article describes as: "what some have called a “mega ritual” event: 9/11." [Because, obviously] "If 9/11 was set to be one of the largest mass rituals in history, it would require some of the grandest predictive programming that could be conjured, beginning as early as 1993 with various questionable insertions into the popular Simpsons TV show."   

And, yes, Alex and friend's are "truthers" too. But honestly, wouldn't it be weirder if they weren't?

But the thing about Alex Jones that's most important to remember, and the real point I wanted to make, is that, like David Icke, and most other popular and successful conspiracy theorists, he isn't really that screaming nut you saw on CNN and the Huffington post. I mean, yes- he's a nut. But he isn't an idiot. And he knows how and when to perform for his audience. And that's exactly what he was doing on both his most recent appearances, and it worked better than you may think. Because he also knows how to sell an idea- it's what he does. And as silly as he may (hopefully) seem to you, he has A LOT of fans. And there are even more people in the world who are already primed and ready to buy into his ideas, if only he could somehow reach them. This week alone, I encountered several people who had never heard of him before, and though they agreed that he was a little over the top, they really liked what he had to say. And that's just scary.

So if you weren't before, make yourself a little more familiar with Alex Jones. Because it's a safe bet that he's only gonna get louder from here.

-CAINE- 

Sources: Info Wars, Rational Wiki


  

Every once in a while the Internets gives us something we just can't help but be thankful for. Sometimes, it's a brief video of one of your favorite astrophysicists dancing to a Michael Jackson song. Other times, it's something so seemingly surreal, you just can't help but ponder how it came to be. The subject of today's entry, most definitely falls into the later category.

In his video "Antichrist Numerology In Gangnam Style", as well as countless other acts of crazy on his YouTube channel (including several more on both songs in question), former furniture engineer (cause apparently, that's a thing you can be) turned self-proclaimed "Co Prophet of The End Times" and "Third Eagle of the Apocalypse" AKA William Tapley, uses the age old pseudoscience of numerology to decipher the deep philosophical meaning behind the videos for "Gangnam Style" and Carly Rae Jepsen's, "Call Me Maybe". Both of which it turns out, are littered with secrete messages from the Antichrist. Which I don't completely disagree with. Well, I do. But I would like to think that the creators of such things are actually THE devil.   

Using the convoluted, Sudoku-like number game, that is numerology, numerologists like Tapely (who's also a Catholic, BTW. Which seems conflicting, but, whatever) are able to add, subtract, multiply, divide, and otherwise BS their way into discovering triple fives and sixes or whatever else they might like, wherever they may go looking for them. From there, it's just a simple matter of applying the correct (and always predictable) theological/supernatural associations, with a little bit of confirmation bias, and serving of personal agendas in order to make your case.


In his video breakdown, The Co-prophet wastes little time before offering irrefutable proof of his claims; beginning his dissertation by decoding the scene to the left. A scene which he believes, is obviously meant to be a depiction of the four horseman of the apocalypse, as well as the lesser known two scantily clad dancing girls of the rapture.

In fairness, I added the bit about the dancing girls. But, really? THOSE are the four horseman? How disappointing would THAT be?



From there, we move on to the first "REAL" bit of numerology in the video, when Tapley clearly establishes that PSY is meant to rep his man the dark lord, based on the appearance of the number 18 on a column in this next scene. Which, as he clearly explains, can be decoded as:  

" 8 + 1 = 9, Or, of course, as the Antichrist's number, 6+6+6."

Yes, of course it could.  It's like when your math teacher taught you that 11 + 2 = 13. Unless of course it doesn't. In which case, the answer is 4. No? ... Never happened? DAMN YOU PUBLIC SCHOOLING!

Later, PSY apparently goes on to meet his rival, "the man in yellow" (believe me I'm just as shocked as you are to find out there's apparently an actual story arc involved) who young William pegs as a representation of the g-o-d, because he is: A) PSY's enemy. Remember, PSY is the devil. And, B) There are 3 fives on the man in yellow's license plate. I mean, really. They're right there. Ya, they're separated by some other stuff, but they're there. You can't argue with facts, man.

There's also another long winded and convoluted bit about the number of numbers a woman in the video has on her shirt, and who/what she's supposed to be. But otherwise, things pretty much deteriorate completely from that point into personal interpretations about god being depicted as cowardly (since his guy wears yellow) and weak (since his guy looses) and a few other pretty standard Antichrist/rapture related apocalypse nonsense about multiculturalism, ETC. but there's nothing particularly entertaining about them. And my absolute favorite of Tapley's mental leaps in this video, actually comes in his much less thorough decoding (in this video anyway) of Carly Rae Jepsen's, Call me maybe. Which, again, he concludes to be a nuanced allegory for the war between god and the antichrist. In this case, with Carly representing Satan/sin, and the gay man in the video representing god, based on the iron-clad logic that his fake phone number begins with the prefix 555. But that's not even the best part.

That honor goes to the astonishing feat of mental contortion required for his decoding of the song's chorus. Which he believes is the Antichrist announcing his arrival, by saying:

" I [The Antichrist] just met you, and this is crazy [This, being the tribulation] so here's my number [gives you the mark of the beast] so call me maybe [my name is Mabus]". Yes, THAT, Mabus.

Mabus, if you don't know, being one of MANY interpretations of the name given to the Antichrist by Nostradamus. That's right, he actually managed to find a way to force a Nostradamus reference into all of this. Amazing.

It could probably go without saying that this is all ultimately very silly, if for no other reason, then because this man has clearly put more thought and consideration into the content of these two songs and videos in nine minutes, than anyone involved in creating them did in the entire production process. But the real, and ultimately unanswerable question you have to ask when you discover people like William Tapley is; is he for real? And the truth is, Poe's law is a thing for a reason. And with something this seemingly overtly insane, you can never really know for sure. Although I am inclined to think he means it. Because if this IS a character, and not a genuine statement of belief. He has both, persistence (given he's been at this since at least 2008) as well as one dry-ass sense of humor.

And I haven't even mentioned his music yet...

-CAINE-