Is it really possible that in all this time, I've only ever even touched on the glorious disaster that is the cult of Scientology, but once? Yes, it appears that is the case. And even when I did, it was really more about Russia's banning of Hubbard's books, than it was the church itself. Time to fix that. Because as the so-called "church" has been spreading out over the years, it's hit a few... let's call them snags, along the way. In the last few years in particular, along with Russia's efforts to ban Hubbard's writings, countries like France and Belgium have attempted to eject the group, by labeling them a criminal organization, primarily based on charges of fraud. And there are rumblings abound, that similar actions are soon to follow in various other places where scientology has only just begun to spread . All of which, is well and truly deserved, in my opinion.

The newest set of fraud charges the organization is currently facing here in America, are being alleged in a lawsuit filed by a couple in Tampa Florida. Luis and Rocio Garcia claim they were mislead into donating $420,000 into the church for charity and relief efforts, as well as for the construction of  the groups "Super Power building". A building which the Pinellas county Property Appraiser's Office has valued at $80 million, but lists as fully tax exempt, and which has sat unfinished in downtown Clearwater FL, since 2003.

From the Tampa Bay Times (which wrote a surprisingly thorough article on this):

"Plaintiffs Luis and Rocio Garcia of Irvine, Calif., name five Scientology corporations as defendants, including the church's main entity in Clearwater. The former church members say they gave Scientology more than $420,000 for the massive "Super Power" building in Clearwater that has never opened, church services they never received and humanitarian projects that never materialized.

The deception went as far as producing phony videos of church earthquake relief efforts to induce parishioners to give, said the Garcias' attorney, Theodore Babbitt of West Palm Beach.

The lawsuit focuses on Scientology leader David Miscavige, saying he exerts control over an "interdependent network of entities" that extracts as much money as it can from parishioners and denies promised refunds. It alleges the church improperly uses donations to finance Miscavige's "lavish lifestyle" and to stifle critics with private investigators and lawyers.

"We believe that these lawsuits will put an end to these practices," Babbitt said.

Clearwater church spokeswoman Pat Harney said: "The church has not been served and has no comment. However, we understand from media inquiries this has something to do with fundraising, and we can unequivocally state all funds solicited are used for the charitable and religious purposes for which they were donated." "

According to the article, the couple also claims they've spoken to dozens of other former members, and similar lawsuits are coming.

Unfortunately, even if the Garcia's allegations against the church are true, and there are plenty of reasons to believe they are, how much success they'll have fighting an organization as well funded as scientology, remains to be seen. After all, we're talking about an organization whose ranks likely only number somewhere in the tens, maybe, hundreds of thousands* -despite their assertions of Tom Cruise having reached over a billion people with scientolgy's message- who still manage to find the capital and resources to defend themselves against entire foreign governments. But with the growing number of similar suits, potential suits in waiting, and the onslaught of bad publicity, criminal charges, and all of the just plain embarrassing allegations that continue to be waged against the organization, there is some hope. And while I doubt we'll ever see an absolute end to scientology as an entity, it seems to be ever more likely that we are at least seeing the beginnings of the end of what little legitimacy it's managed to create for itself in the eyes of the general public.

Now if we could just get people to apply the same critical eye to "transubstantiation" or the vatican's banking practices.

Baby stepping towards apostasy...

Ba-by steps.... (1,000,000,000 bonus points to you if you get this reference, BTW.)

-CAINE-

Source: Tampabay.com

*The actual number of "practicing" scientologist, is debatable, and ultimately unconfirmable, as the "church" goes to great links to keep said figures as vague and confusing as possible.

Finally, because I simply cannot resist any opportunity to share it, THIS mangled train wreck of crazy. Which you may have forgotten existed. But I didn't, Oh no my friend. I remember it well.

Every once in a while the Internets gives us something we just can't help but be thankful for. Sometimes, it's a brief video of one of your favorite astrophysicists dancing to a Michael Jackson song. Other times, it's something so seemingly surreal, you just can't help but ponder how it came to be. The subject of today's entry, most definitely falls into the later category.

In his video "Antichrist Numerology In Gangnam Style", as well as countless other acts of crazy on his YouTube channel (including several more on both songs in question), former furniture engineer (cause apparently, that's a thing you can be) turned self-proclaimed "Co Prophet of The End Times" and "Third Eagle of the Apocalypse" AKA William Tapley, uses the age old pseudoscience of numerology to decipher the deep philosophical meaning behind the videos for "Gangnam Style" and Carly Rae Jepsen's, "Call Me Maybe". Both of which it turns out, are littered with secrete messages from the Antichrist. Which I don't completely disagree with. Well, I do. But I would like to think that the creators of such things are actually THE devil.   

Using the convoluted, Sudoku-like number game, that is numerology, numerologists like Tapely (who's also a Catholic, BTW. Which seems conflicting, but, whatever) are able to add, subtract, multiply, divide, and otherwise BS their way into discovering triple fives and sixes or whatever else they might like, wherever they may go looking for them. From there, it's just a simple matter of applying the correct (and always predictable) theological/supernatural associations, with a little bit of confirmation bias, and serving of personal agendas in order to make your case.


In his video breakdown, The Co-prophet wastes little time before offering irrefutable proof of his claims; beginning his dissertation by decoding the scene to the left. A scene which he believes, is obviously meant to be a depiction of the four horseman of the apocalypse, as well as the lesser known two scantily clad dancing girls of the rapture.

In fairness, I added the bit about the dancing girls. But, really? THOSE are the four horseman? How disappointing would THAT be?



From there, we move on to the first "REAL" bit of numerology in the video, when Tapley clearly establishes that PSY is meant to rep his man the dark lord, based on the appearance of the number 18 on a column in this next scene. Which, as he clearly explains, can be decoded as:  

" 8 + 1 = 9, Or, of course, as the Antichrist's number, 6+6+6."

Yes, of course it could.  It's like when your math teacher taught you that 11 + 2 = 13. Unless of course it doesn't. In which case, the answer is 4. No? ... Never happened? DAMN YOU PUBLIC SCHOOLING!

Later, PSY apparently goes on to meet his rival, "the man in yellow" (believe me I'm just as shocked as you are to find out there's apparently an actual story arc involved) who young William pegs as a representation of the g-o-d, because he is: A) PSY's enemy. Remember, PSY is the devil. And, B) There are 3 fives on the man in yellow's license plate. I mean, really. They're right there. Ya, they're separated by some other stuff, but they're there. You can't argue with facts, man.

There's also another long winded and convoluted bit about the number of numbers a woman in the video has on her shirt, and who/what she's supposed to be. But otherwise, things pretty much deteriorate completely from that point into personal interpretations about god being depicted as cowardly (since his guy wears yellow) and weak (since his guy looses) and a few other pretty standard Antichrist/rapture related apocalypse nonsense about multiculturalism, ETC. but there's nothing particularly entertaining about them. And my absolute favorite of Tapley's mental leaps in this video, actually comes in his much less thorough decoding (in this video anyway) of Carly Rae Jepsen's, Call me maybe. Which, again, he concludes to be a nuanced allegory for the war between god and the antichrist. In this case, with Carly representing Satan/sin, and the gay man in the video representing god, based on the iron-clad logic that his fake phone number begins with the prefix 555. But that's not even the best part.

That honor goes to the astonishing feat of mental contortion required for his decoding of the song's chorus. Which he believes is the Antichrist announcing his arrival, by saying:

" I [The Antichrist] just met you, and this is crazy [This, being the tribulation] so here's my number [gives you the mark of the beast] so call me maybe [my name is Mabus]". Yes, THAT, Mabus.

Mabus, if you don't know, being one of MANY interpretations of the name given to the Antichrist by Nostradamus. That's right, he actually managed to find a way to force a Nostradamus reference into all of this. Amazing.

It could probably go without saying that this is all ultimately very silly, if for no other reason, then because this man has clearly put more thought and consideration into the content of these two songs and videos in nine minutes, than anyone involved in creating them did in the entire production process. But the real, and ultimately unanswerable question you have to ask when you discover people like William Tapley is; is he for real? And the truth is, Poe's law is a thing for a reason. And with something this seemingly overtly insane, you can never really know for sure. Although I am inclined to think he means it. Because if this IS a character, and not a genuine statement of belief. He has both, persistence (given he's been at this since at least 2008) as well as one dry-ass sense of humor.

And I haven't even mentioned his music yet...

-CAINE-

Last week, a website called Big Think, released the above video, in which Bill Nye shares some of his thoughts on why creationism is not an appropriate thing to teach children to believe. Not surprisingly, this prompted a predictable response from both sides of the..issue? Debate? No... Ummm.... AH: Prompting a predictable response from both sides of the ongoing commentary on the meaningless and distracting waste of time that is the non-theory of creationism and intelligent design, and the non existent scientific controversy over evolution. Which the creators of said non-theory have deliberately manufactured, in order to try and keep their nonsensical, simpleminded little fantasy about the nature of reality alive just a WEEeee-bit longer. Ya, that seems right. Unwieldy, yes. But right.

In case you don't know (are you new here?), creationism (young Earth creationism, creation science, intelligent design, ETC.) is a made up, pseudo-scientific means, of  attempting to prove a literal interpretation of the bible, through the age old  art of special pleading, and a little good ole fashioned misinformation, self-delusion, and denial. But -like every other established cell of the Abrahamic religions- intelligent designers aren't content to live in their own lukewarm pool of happy ignorance, and have spent the better part of the past 60 years or so, attempting to subvert science education, and even the public understanding of the basic words and terms associated with science, in order to wedge their personal religious beliefs into the public consciousness. Their tactic of choice for achieving this goal, has been through continued and still ongoing attempts to eliminate or at least retard the teaching of evolution in public schools, while deliberately re-branding and mislabeling their own biblically inspired belief system as a legitimate science. Which, not to spoil the ending for you, BUT- it isn't. 

Just in case I haven't been clear enough about my feelings on the subject yet, either here or in past writings, it's safe to say that I am not a fan of creationism/intelligent design; or whatever the hell it is they may be calling themselves this week, or at any point in the future. More to the point, it's one of the many worthless ideas in the world that I see as deserving of only ridicule, disrespect, and out right dismissal, as it is of absolutely no intellectual value whatsoever. I genuinely don't think I can make my feelings about it any more clear than that. And yes, the fact that it's a religious interpretation of reality doesn't win it any points, where my particular world view is concerned. But the real reason I think creationism deserving of  uninhibited criticism and attack, is the fact that it's creators and promoters openly and deliberately work to deny and disguise the religious nature of  their beliefs, in order to subvert the general public's understanding of the scientific facts of reality. Also, it's just silly.

Whatever your feelings on people's rights to their personal beliefs and interpretations of reality; and on a personal level, I'm fine with people believing whatever nutty thing they like, provided it doesn't impact my existence in any way shape or form; determining the value of creationism is simple. Your proposed model of reality is either, A: a personal philosophical view without need of outside verification. Or B: it's a scientific theory. You don't get to have it both ways. If it's a personal choice, then you are free to shield both it and yourself, from the facts which contradict it. But, if you choose to label what you believe a science, then it must stand up to critical scrutiny and the trials of the scientific method. If it cannot, and intelligent design (creationism, ETC.), can't, then it is not science.

-CAINE-

VIA:National Geographic

Pentecostal snake handlers - They actually prefer the term serpent handlers, but, I have long standing tradition of not respecting the wishes of stupid people. Also, I think snake handling sounds dirtier, so- are a tiny subset of  x-tianity, that believes handling poisonous snakes to be a way of both testing and proving their faith in god. This particular brand of religious based idiocy was created in the late 1800's, by George Went Hensley, in a small church in Tennessee. And is currently practiced primarily in a handful of tiny congregations throughout the Appalachians, and other parts of the southeastern United States.

Because, somehow,  "Snake handling Preacher Killed By Snake", was shocking enough a headline to make national news. Though to me, it's about as shocking a story as the one associated with, "Man stands in Rain, Ends Up Wet.", would be. This, thankfully tiny group of religious nuts, managed to find it's way into the headlines last week. When -apparently- famous snake handling preacher Mack Wolford,, succumbed to a bite he received from a yellow timber rattlesnake at an evangelistic event in a state park about 80 miles west of Bluefield, in West Virginia
  
Now, obviously, a man is dead, and that's very sad for the people who cared for him. But I have another rule: It's impossible for anything tragic to happen to you, if you choose to deliberately engage in in the practice of tempting death on a regular basis. This rule applies to extreme sports, snorting chemicals for recreation, fans of The Dave Mathews Band*, and most certainly, irritating venomous animals as a means of asserting your belief in your invisible friend's will to protect you from harm. Which is the whole point of snake handling in the first place.

But while believers in the godly virtues of snake fondling do justify their practice of deliberately pissing off poisonous creatures, as a means of showing their dedication to god. There are also, according to those who practice the ritual, a number of misconceptions about their beliefs. The most common of which being that the faithful believe they either cannot get bitten, or that if they are, they will not die, thanks to some special protection granted them through their covenant with god. Personally, I suspect this particular "misconception" exists primarily because the entire faith is based, as far I can tell anyway, on two quotes from the new testament. Both of which specifically mention escaping death and or injury at the hand of venom and poison, based on a special covenant with god:

(Mark 16:17-18) And these signs shall follow them that believe: In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues. They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover -

 And-  (Luke 10:19) Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you.


So apparently, turns out god was serious about the, taking up and treading upon of serpents and scorpions bits, just not so much with the, avoiding death and harm, bits. Which is great. Cause, ya know, otherwise it's really hard to explain to people how your particular brand of BS could be true, when those who practice it continuously die as result, despite god promising you that very thing would not happen.

Glad we cleared that up.

-CAINE-

*Publicly broadcasting the music of Dave Mathews is CLEARLY an act of aggression and hatred towards others. Like all violent acts, it is only reasonable to assume you may someday justifiably suffer retribution, as a direct result of your own actions.

As you may already be aware, for some time now the Vatican has been dealing with a bit of a "scandal".

What?...No, not THAT one.

I mean, geez, how many times must the Vatican barely acknowledge the church's long standing practice of both harboring and enabling pedophiles by shielding them from prosecution and paying victims to keep their mouths shut, before you, insensitive, immoral heathens, stop harping about it? [What sarcasm?] No, this time it's something - apparently- even more, embarrassing, scandalous, and inconvenient to admit, than the fact that the religious cult on which your city-state is built, is filthy with pedophiles and the men who love to help them get away with it.

Saturday, the Vatican charged the Pope's personal butler Paolo Gabriele, with aggravated theft, in connection with the so-called Vatileaks scandal -Ya, I know. But at least the media's not making everything a "gate" anymore- after claiming to have found him to be in possession of confidential documents. Encouragingly -where public perception of the Vatican's credibility is concerned- many seem to feel Gabriele is not actually the man behind the Vatican leaks, but, rather, a scapegoat in the organization's attempt to save face. Which seems likely, given the circumstances. Me personally, I'm still just trying to process the idea that the pope has a butler. When did he become Batman?

For those of you unfamiliar with the whole Vatileaks thing: For several months now, the Italian media has been publishing leaked letters from the Vatican concerning various conflicts, power struggles, and potential corruptions, within the church-state. As usual, the holy state has done it's best to try and minimize damage from the leaks, and challenge the validity of the claims made within them, by painting itself as the victim of an insidious plot designed to undermine the church's authority and moral standing. But that task got a lot harder this week, with the publication of; Your Holiness: The Secrete Papers of  Benedict XVI.

Published by journalist Gianluigi Nuzzi, Your Holiness, is filled with even more leaked documents and letters from within the Vatican city walls, including some directed to Cap'n pointy-hat himself. And following the book's publication, Ettore Gotti Tedeschi, head of the Vatican Bank, opted to step down from his position, due to information in the book regarding his mismanagement of said financial institution.

As for the feelings of the man in the silly hat on the subject. Pope Palpatine didn't actually address the scandal or his butler's arrest directly in today's pentecost Sunday address. But he did have the following to say: 

Translation: It's getting way harder for us control information, and people are starting to actually question what the Vatican, as well as the church, say and do, rather than blindly following whatever I say out of fear- and that makes pope-y all sad and junk.

We can only hope he's right, and the current level of distrust surrounding his silly little country spreads to his religion and grows, and grows, until finally- no one cares what he, his alleged country, or his church, has to say about anything, anymore.


-CAINE-

VIA: www.telegraph.co.uk (and various others)

I usually try and reserve most of the photo only stuff to the tumblr, but this one was just too good.

And just in case you don't get the reference:


So remember kids. Before you go calling someone "bald head". You might wanna make sure that someone isn't one of god's crew. Otherwise, the all loving, benevolent super-being in the sky, just might send bears to rip you, and forty of your innocent adolescent friends into tiny, little, bits. And That'll show ya.

NOW  STOP MAKING FUN OF MY PONYTAIL AND GET OFF MY LAWN, YA LITTLE BASTARDS!!!

-CAINE-

One of the many things I missed commenting on during my latest hiatus from the web, was the passage of the so-called "Monkey Bill" in Tennessee. This bill grants teachers in the state the right to teach the "strengths and weaknesses" of scientific theories like, climate change, human cloning, and evolution, with little fear of repercussion. The idea of allowing individual teachers to promote their own personal agenda under the guise of teaching any subject is so obviously flawed a concept, it seems utterly insane that anyone would even suggest it. That is, of course, unless personal agendas, not academic freedom or even truth,  are what you actually care about, as is the case with the supporters of this bills, and others like it. Then it starts making sense.

The "strength and weaknesses" argument, or the idea that teachers should be allowed to "teach the controversy" of certain scientific theories -specifically, evolution- is a tired, but growingly successful tactic employed by religious creationists. The group adopted the strategy as part of a pseudo-scientific makeover the organization underwent, following their defeat at the hands of a1987 supreme court ruling, which rightly deemed the teaching of their religiously based fiction in public schools to be a violation of church and state. In response to this defeat, Creationists manufactured a completely non-existent scientific controversy (more on that in a minute), relabeled their efforts a struggle for academic freedom, adopted the, extra sciency-sounding moniker: "Intelligent Design", and went back to lobbying for their cause: Undermining the teaching of science and circumventing the separation of church and state, in order to infect public education with religion.

But just for fun, let's pretend the creationist agenda really is about education (which it isn't) and not about promoting a religious agenda through pseudo-science (which it is). So what about the scientific controversy surrounding the validity of Darwinian Evolution? I mean, if science isn't even sure evolution is real, isn't that something children should know about?

It certainly would be, if it were true. But it isn't.

There is NO scientific controversy as to weather or not evolution is true, NONE.  To science, evolution is as much a fact of reality, as gravity; which is also absolutely true, and also "just a theory". Yes, there's an ongoing effort to fully understand the specific mechanisms which drive the phenomena of evolution, and to complete the paths it has taken to drive all species on the planet to their current states; because that's how science works. But there is NO question as to weather or not evolution has taken place, or that it continues to take place today.

As for Creationism/Intelligent Design, on the other hand. The lack of scientific evidence supporting the handful of quantifiable claims they're willing to make, is equally definitive. IN other words, there isn't any. Which is the problem with trying to label your religious fantasy a testable, provable science; people will try and test it, and then end up disproving it.

The simple fact is, the "theory" that we live in a universe that's 6,000 to 12,000 years old; that all the organisms on the planet were either designed as they exist today, or, after escaping extinction by taking refuge from a world-wide flood on the deck of mythical boat, underwent some ridiculous, made up, hyperactive version of evolution in order to diverge into all of the species on the planet today- simply does not fit with reality.  Evolution on the other hand, like climate change (sorry, it's real too. But we'll deal with that another day), does. And the only place any controversy about evolution exits, is in the mind of creationists.

-CAINE-



 

Posted by Youtube user: Thunderf00t

Posted by Youtube user: fraserdldavidson

Posted by Youtube user:HighpantsResistance VIA:GGB on tumblr

Posted by Youtube user: P0YKPAC

Slayer: "Cult" Performed live on The Henry Rollins show.

Posted by Youtube user:shuldinerdrum

LYRICS:
Oppression is the Holy Law
In God I distrust
In time His monuments will fall
Like ashes to dust
Is war and creed the master plan?
The Bible's where it all began
Its propaganda sells despair
And spreads the virus everywhere

[Refrain:]
Religion is hate
Religion is fear
Religion is war
Religion is rape
Religion's obscene
Religion's a whore

The pestilence of Jesus Christ
There never was a sacrifice
No man upon the crucifix
Beware the cult of purity
Infectious imbecility
I've made my choice
666!

Corruption breeds the pedophile
Don't pray for the priest
Confession finds the lonely child
God preys on the weak
You think your soul can still be saved
I think you're fucking miles away
Scream out loud, here's where you begin
Forgive me Father for I have sinned!

[Refrain:]

The target's fucking Jesus Christ
I would've lead the sacrifice
And nailed him to the crucifix
Beware the cult of purity
Infectious imbecility
I've made my choice
666!

Jesus is pain
Jesus is gore
Jesus is the blood
That's spilled in war
He's everything
He's all things dead
He's pulling on the trigger
Pointed at your head!

Through the fear you're sold into the fraud
Revelation,
Revolution,
I see through your Christ illusion!

The war on terror just drags along
My war with God is growing strong
His propaganda sells despair
And spreads this violence everywhere

[Refrain:]

There is no fucking Jesus Christ
There never was a sacrifice
No man upon the crucifix
Beware the cult of purity
Infectious imbecility
I've made my choice
666!

Posted by Youtube user:tavoman

In other news, is the pope REALLY just a frilled lizard in a silly dress? I say, yes!

So I couldn't find any relevant or entertaining pope-related videos that I hadn't already posted, so I decided to re-post an old favorite. So once again, let's learn about the catholic church with Louis CK.

Posted by Youtube user:louisck