Pastor Joe Nelms Thanks god for All His Beloved Sponsors, and his Hot Wife

Posted by Youtube user: Paulk9pg

What sporting event (and I use the term EXTREMELY loosely in this case) would be complete without someone first asking the all mighty dictator in the sky, to take few moments out of it’s busy schedule of permitting believers to commit genocide in it’s name, and watching poor children starve to death; to turn it’s attention to the outcome of a meaningless contest being played by a few dozen bored millionaires?

Well, pastor Joe Nelms went above and beyond at a recent Nascar event, making sure to ask, not only for the lord to grant protection to all the drivers in the race, but to thank his deity for providing each and every sponsor of the event, as well as his own “hot wife”.

“In Jesus name, Boogity, Boogity, Boogity,…Amen!”

No really, that’s how the prayer ended. I don’t know what that means, but I would like to sponsor a law requiring all believers to identify themselves from this point on, by throwing their hands up and yelling “In (INSERT DEITY HERE)’s Name, boogity, boogity, boogity, AMEN!”, whenever they enter a public space. Not only would this make it much easier for me to identify people to avoid in social situations, but it becomes a whole lot harder to sell anyone your mindless bullshit, after they’ve seen you throw up your hands and shout gibberish at a crowded room full of strangers; I realize that seems sort of redundant, but this form of gibberish is much more obvious to a wider spectrum of people.

At the very least, we can always hope that this whole product placement thing will catch on, prompting the mighty-one to move on to a new business model, and instead of begging money from poor people in churches, it can go straight for corporate sponsorship. After all, look how well that same model is working for America!

Git R Done!

-CAINE-

VIA: GGB on Tumblr

Time lapse, "Sky", by Phillip Bloom

Rainbow Toad Found After 87 Years

Holy Cornholio, The Epic Return of Beavis and Butthead!

Two things I learned via reports from this weeks Comic-con:

1)MTV is apparently still a network, why?

2) They will be airing NEW episodes of Beavis and Butthead in October!

In the above first look at the new run, which looks and feels nearly identical to the original, Beavis' alter ego becomes the leader of a cult thanks to his stigmata, In an episode entitled "Holy Cornholio". See kids, it's a skeptical show! Like South Park, only funny. (yes I said it, and NO, is doesn't have anything to do with the Dawkins episode, I'm just not a fan)

As for the rest of the shows format, which, for those of you unfamiliar included breaks in each episode in which Beavis and Butthead trashed various music videos, that too has remained. But it looks as though this time around, instead of music videos, since MTV apparently doesn't play them anymore(what the hell does the "M" stand for then?), the duo will be spending their time on the couch in between scenes, trashing the networks own reality shows. Which is admittedly a pretty soft target, and a fairly repulsive bit of self-promotion on the networks part. But the end result is still funny, and I have to say, I do agree with Butthead's theory (well there's something I never thought I'd write) that tracing the sexual history of the cast of The Jersey Shore could potentially lead back to the origins of herpes.

In short, [in my best Butthead voice:]


-CAINE-

VIA: Laughing Squid

Pluto Has a New Moon, & it Needs a Name

Using the Hubble Space Telescope, astronomers have discovered a tiny new moon orbiting Pluto. This newest object, currently dubbed "P4", is estimated to be between13 and 34 kilometres across, and joins three other known satellites orbiting the former planet; Hydra, Nix, and Charon.

Moving past what some would call the strange irony, and even confusion, of an object no longer designated as a planet having it's own moons (if you STILL don't get Pluto's downgrade, try going HERE), Pluto's newest companion needs a name. And while there isn't any official way to go about suggesting one, there are a number of places to go where your suggestions could potentially be heard.

Personally, I suggest you visit the source for this entry on New Scientist, where Mark Showalter, who lead the team who discovered the object, left the following comment:

"I want you all to know that we're paying attention to this thread. We welcome any and all serious suggestions. The name must come from Greek mythology and be associated with Hades and the Underworld. We'll probably be making our recommendations to the IAU Nomenclature committee within a week or two. Sorry, no cash prizes."

You obviously shouldn't expect any recognition for your efforts either, as this is really more like casting a vote. But hey, if your suggestion does end up being chosen as the name of Pluto's newest moon, no one's going to stop you if you decide to go around bragging to your friends that they went with your personal suggestion. Of course, unless your friends are as geeky and uncool as I am, they probably won't care.

[sigh]

-CAINE-

Source: New Scientist

Creepy Harry Potter Babies

Because regular babies just weren’t creepy enough on their own, Artful Babies decided to make extra creepy life-like replicas of them, in doll form, which you can “adopt” for your very own, starting at around 300 euros.

Then, Artful Babies doll artist,Tracy Ann Lister , decided to take the creepy one step further, and designed a custom set of extra, EXTRA, creepy Harry Potter themed babies, which you can see HERE in full, if you are so inclined.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’M NEVER GOING TO SLEEP AGAIN!

-CAINE-

VIA: Cakehead Loves Evil